Are you a person who has an extra time and wants to start a home based business? Here are a few home based businesses you could start.
1.Trainer: If you have a skill that you can teach others at home, you can start your own business as a personal trainer, visiting clients in their home on whatever you can; fitness trainer, music instrument trainer, academic trainer etc..
2. Consulting: If you are an expert in a specific industry, such as a particular business venture consider
beginning your own consulting business.
3. Information Technology: If you can design quality Web sites, or you are good in creating graphics consider turning your skills into a home-based business. Because this industry is constantly changing, good Web designers are always in demand.
4. Care givers: The rising number of babies, senior citizens and physically challenged people who want to stay in their own homes means big opportunity for non medical home care providers, who help seniors with tasks of daily living.
5. Photography: If you are skilled with a camera, you can open your own photography business. You can visit clients at their homes or, if you have space, set up a small studio in your home.
6. Remodeling: If you are a gifted carpenter or contractor, you can turn your passion into your own business. Find a niche that's in demand in your area and target it.
7. Interior design: If you have a flair for the creative, consider interior design. There are different Societies
of Interior Designers; internet provides resources for aspiring interior designers, including a list of each
state's requirements for licensing.
8. Catering or personal chef: Consider starting your own catering or personal chef business. Target a niche by providing specialized services such as low-carb or vegetarian menus. (Catering requires a food establishment license and a commercially equipped kitchen that meets state and federal health requirements. Contact your local city or county health department for more information.)
9. Gift baskets: Gift basket creation is a popular and creative home-based business. You can sell your baskets online and target both individuals and businesses to increase potential sales.
10. Wedding or event planner: If you are an ace at organizing important events and have a lot of contacts,
consider becoming a wedding or event planner. There are numerous certification courses online.
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Monday, April 12, 2010
8 Tips to Help You Become a LGN Prosperity Networking Guru!
Effective business networking is the bringing together of like minded individuals who, through relationship building, become walking, talking advertisements for one another.
Keep in mind that networking is about being bona fide, building trust, and seeing how your relationship can genuinely help others.
1. Always figure out before you even walk into a room, what your specific goals are in attending each networking meeting. This helps you to pick groups or associations that will help you get what you are looking for.
2. Ask open-ended questions during your networking conversations, questions that ask who, what, where, when, and how. Try to avoid questions that require a simple yes or no response. By using this line of questioning you can open us the discussion and show listeners that you are interested.
3. Become a walking resource centre. When you become known as a strong resource, others remember to turn to you for suggestions, ideas, names of other people, etc. This keeps you at their "top of mind".
4. Make sure you have your "elevator speech" prepared and know it like the back of your hand. An elevator speech is the commonly known as the response you would give in the amount of time it would take to reach the tenth floor in an elevator. Always rehearse your spiel and be genuine, so that you don't sound automated when you relay it to someone who asks what you do.
5. Always know what is going on in current affairs, if you don't feel comfortable just rolling into a spiel when you first meet someone, have a back up topic to break the ice until you do.
6. Never just throw your business card at someone the minute you meet them, you must get to know the person and their business as well as explaining your business before you even contemplate a business card exchange. Some people will find you rude, pushy and unprofessional which will in turn reflect badly on your business.
7. Always phone or email your new contacts and let them know that you enjoyed meeting them. If possible mention things that you discussed on a more personal note (i.e. I hope you enjoyed that movie you were going to see that night.) people will come to know you as someone who listens, remembers them and they will form a trust with you.
8. The most important thing to remember is to follow through quickly and efficiently on referrals you are given. When people give you referrals, your actions are a reflection on them. Respect and honor their trust and your referrals will grow exponentially.
Just a questiom. Are you looking for a business that you are proud of? I can you, making money has never been easier than with this proven system. Your customers are sure to be happy with the products and you continue to make money from sales. With billions of people on the internet then your profits have no limit with lgn-prosperity. This could all be yours in one easy step that takes only a few minutes of your time.
This could be a way for you to have a better life, especially in these tough economic times. If you are looking to earn a little extra money or if you want to do this full time, you won't find a better system than this. The results have been proven time and again. You can even check out the testimonials for yourself right on their site.
So what are you waiting for? Sign up today with LGN Prosperity and the little guy network and watch your bank account grow beyond your wildest dreams. This is the perfect way to get started with a business all your own and never have to answer to a boss again.
http://www.myincomefromhome.net
Keep in mind that networking is about being bona fide, building trust, and seeing how your relationship can genuinely help others.
1. Always figure out before you even walk into a room, what your specific goals are in attending each networking meeting. This helps you to pick groups or associations that will help you get what you are looking for.
2. Ask open-ended questions during your networking conversations, questions that ask who, what, where, when, and how. Try to avoid questions that require a simple yes or no response. By using this line of questioning you can open us the discussion and show listeners that you are interested.
3. Become a walking resource centre. When you become known as a strong resource, others remember to turn to you for suggestions, ideas, names of other people, etc. This keeps you at their "top of mind".
4. Make sure you have your "elevator speech" prepared and know it like the back of your hand. An elevator speech is the commonly known as the response you would give in the amount of time it would take to reach the tenth floor in an elevator. Always rehearse your spiel and be genuine, so that you don't sound automated when you relay it to someone who asks what you do.
5. Always know what is going on in current affairs, if you don't feel comfortable just rolling into a spiel when you first meet someone, have a back up topic to break the ice until you do.
6. Never just throw your business card at someone the minute you meet them, you must get to know the person and their business as well as explaining your business before you even contemplate a business card exchange. Some people will find you rude, pushy and unprofessional which will in turn reflect badly on your business.
7. Always phone or email your new contacts and let them know that you enjoyed meeting them. If possible mention things that you discussed on a more personal note (i.e. I hope you enjoyed that movie you were going to see that night.) people will come to know you as someone who listens, remembers them and they will form a trust with you.
8. The most important thing to remember is to follow through quickly and efficiently on referrals you are given. When people give you referrals, your actions are a reflection on them. Respect and honor their trust and your referrals will grow exponentially.
Just a questiom. Are you looking for a business that you are proud of? I can you, making money has never been easier than with this proven system. Your customers are sure to be happy with the products and you continue to make money from sales. With billions of people on the internet then your profits have no limit with lgn-prosperity. This could all be yours in one easy step that takes only a few minutes of your time.
This could be a way for you to have a better life, especially in these tough economic times. If you are looking to earn a little extra money or if you want to do this full time, you won't find a better system than this. The results have been proven time and again. You can even check out the testimonials for yourself right on their site.
So what are you waiting for? Sign up today with LGN Prosperity and the little guy network and watch your bank account grow beyond your wildest dreams. This is the perfect way to get started with a business all your own and never have to answer to a boss again.
http://www.myincomefromhome.net
So You Want to Redesign Your Home!
Many people today are planning to redesign their home for a new look or stage their home for sale. Let’s examine each of these activities in more detail.
First, why are many people doing a home redesign? The economy today has a lot to do with it. The housing market has lost approximately 50% of its value so selling a home and purchasing a new one is difficult or impossible if you have a mortgage. The option to a new home is to redesign the old one, and perhaps adding an addition.
Doing a home redesign is very intimidating for many people. It involves a number of areas of expertise such as design theme, furniture selection, layout, color theory, accessories, fabrics, arrangements, cost control and budgeting, etc. If you have the money you can always hire a professional designer or decorator. However, in today’s economy many people are looking for ways to do it themselves. Fortunately, there are a great number of self help options available on the internet.
Even more difficult for many is having to sell their home. Again the economy is the culprit. Not all realtors are good at staging homes, so what are your options? What is staging a home in the first place and why do you need to do it. Why can’t you just sell your home as is and the prospects can take it as is. Well, here are the reasons given by most realtors and professional stagers.
First, over time most families accumulate an enormous amount of furniture and goods.
Unless you are a minimalist, your place will probably look cluttered to the prospect who is trying to visualize their furniture in your home. The prospect buys on emotion and you must appeal to them. Therefore, less is more appealing. Staging professionals know what to keep and what to discard. They know how to layout to create a pleasing visual arrangement to the prospective buyer.
Second, color and arrangements are vital to get a quick sale and an acceptable price.
Professional stagers have a list of key buying factors that are paramount to success. The success of stagers are evident if you watch HGTV as many times they go into a home that is not selling and by using staging techniques, help the owners to a successful sale.
Again, should you decide to sell the home without a realtor or your realtor is not a professional stager, there are options available on the internet to help you accomplish this task. Go to any search engine,i.e. Google, Bing, Yahoo Search, etc. and key in some keywords relating to your task such as “stage a home†or “professional home stagers†and see what comes up. Many of them will offer tips on staging relating to their expertise hoping to get you interested in their services.
Finally, stagers will be able to recommend any changes or upgrades that will be necessary to sell the home at the maximum price, i.e. flooring, counters, etc. Again, there is a plethora of help available to you on the internet to help in this area.
In conclusion, you can find the help you need to redesign or stage you home on the internet without hiring a professional decorator.
First, why are many people doing a home redesign? The economy today has a lot to do with it. The housing market has lost approximately 50% of its value so selling a home and purchasing a new one is difficult or impossible if you have a mortgage. The option to a new home is to redesign the old one, and perhaps adding an addition.
Doing a home redesign is very intimidating for many people. It involves a number of areas of expertise such as design theme, furniture selection, layout, color theory, accessories, fabrics, arrangements, cost control and budgeting, etc. If you have the money you can always hire a professional designer or decorator. However, in today’s economy many people are looking for ways to do it themselves. Fortunately, there are a great number of self help options available on the internet.
Even more difficult for many is having to sell their home. Again the economy is the culprit. Not all realtors are good at staging homes, so what are your options? What is staging a home in the first place and why do you need to do it. Why can’t you just sell your home as is and the prospects can take it as is. Well, here are the reasons given by most realtors and professional stagers.
First, over time most families accumulate an enormous amount of furniture and goods.
Unless you are a minimalist, your place will probably look cluttered to the prospect who is trying to visualize their furniture in your home. The prospect buys on emotion and you must appeal to them. Therefore, less is more appealing. Staging professionals know what to keep and what to discard. They know how to layout to create a pleasing visual arrangement to the prospective buyer.
Second, color and arrangements are vital to get a quick sale and an acceptable price.
Professional stagers have a list of key buying factors that are paramount to success. The success of stagers are evident if you watch HGTV as many times they go into a home that is not selling and by using staging techniques, help the owners to a successful sale.
Again, should you decide to sell the home without a realtor or your realtor is not a professional stager, there are options available on the internet to help you accomplish this task. Go to any search engine,i.e. Google, Bing, Yahoo Search, etc. and key in some keywords relating to your task such as “stage a home†or “professional home stagers†and see what comes up. Many of them will offer tips on staging relating to their expertise hoping to get you interested in their services.
Finally, stagers will be able to recommend any changes or upgrades that will be necessary to sell the home at the maximum price, i.e. flooring, counters, etc. Again, there is a plethora of help available to you on the internet to help in this area.
In conclusion, you can find the help you need to redesign or stage you home on the internet without hiring a professional decorator.
Choosing Engagement Rings
When you find your true love and propose marriage to her, it is celebration time. At this occasion what better gifts can be given other than beautiful engagement rings that will be cherished by the lady of your life for the rest of her life? This has been a tradition for hundreds of years with the only variation that the quality, designs, and composition of the rings have changed over the years. In view of the different types of rings that are available in the jewelry stores, it is certainly an uphill task to choose something that will match the personal style and taste of the lady. It should be a unique engagement ring that she will also have chosen for herself.
Combination Of Stones
Expert designers who create new designs of engagement rings have produced many varieties that will allure any lady. Instead of having a single piece of diamond, the latest designs incorporate a combination of stones that give them a spectacular look. A huge sapphire in the midst of diamonds adorned the ring of Princess Diana. Innumerable combinations of stones can be designed, each one having its own beauty. Jewelry shops, brides' magazines, and product catalogs have a large variety of rings. The internet is also a good source of checking all the new designs available with various jewelry shops. It is very convenient to make a choice because a few clicks can unveil a plethora of designs.
Nowadays, the trend is to go in for something out of the ordinary. It is possible to choose a unique engagement ring from the offerings of specialist jewelry designers. Basically, it is just a matter of personal choice and having something that nobody else possesses. Customers can also give their designs, such as placing their birthstone in the middle, be it ruby or emerald, and encircling it with diamonds of different shapes or sizes.
How To Choose?
Diamond engagement rings are considered as the most appropriate symbol which can depict your love and buying one is the most rewarding purchases you will ever make. It is, however, not easy to choose engagement rings. The ultimate intent is to please the recipient and ensure that she likes what is given to her. You will certainly like to give the message that you have kept her personal style and taste in mind and have picked a ring that will match her existing jewelry collection. It is also important to ascertain whether she prefers the traditional or modern style of jewelry. You can also do a little research on the Internet based on her existing jewelry and then decide what will suit her and be appreciated by her. If finances permit, you should also look at designer engagement rings on various websites. If you are still not able to make a choice, there is no harm in consulting her female relatives. You should also ensure that you have the option of changing or upgrading the engagement rings, in case she does not like what you have given her.
Combination Of Stones
Expert designers who create new designs of engagement rings have produced many varieties that will allure any lady. Instead of having a single piece of diamond, the latest designs incorporate a combination of stones that give them a spectacular look. A huge sapphire in the midst of diamonds adorned the ring of Princess Diana. Innumerable combinations of stones can be designed, each one having its own beauty. Jewelry shops, brides' magazines, and product catalogs have a large variety of rings. The internet is also a good source of checking all the new designs available with various jewelry shops. It is very convenient to make a choice because a few clicks can unveil a plethora of designs.
Nowadays, the trend is to go in for something out of the ordinary. It is possible to choose a unique engagement ring from the offerings of specialist jewelry designers. Basically, it is just a matter of personal choice and having something that nobody else possesses. Customers can also give their designs, such as placing their birthstone in the middle, be it ruby or emerald, and encircling it with diamonds of different shapes or sizes.
How To Choose?
Diamond engagement rings are considered as the most appropriate symbol which can depict your love and buying one is the most rewarding purchases you will ever make. It is, however, not easy to choose engagement rings. The ultimate intent is to please the recipient and ensure that she likes what is given to her. You will certainly like to give the message that you have kept her personal style and taste in mind and have picked a ring that will match her existing jewelry collection. It is also important to ascertain whether she prefers the traditional or modern style of jewelry. You can also do a little research on the Internet based on her existing jewelry and then decide what will suit her and be appreciated by her. If finances permit, you should also look at designer engagement rings on various websites. If you are still not able to make a choice, there is no harm in consulting her female relatives. You should also ensure that you have the option of changing or upgrading the engagement rings, in case she does not like what you have given her.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Nursing-A most Respectable and Booming profession in the United States
If you are looking to make up your career in healthcare industry then being a nurse can always be considered as one of the best options in current scenario. Making a career as a nurse offers numerous benefits and rewards. Today, it won’t be wrong to say that if you join the nursing field, you will be joining a career that is one of the largest in the field of healthcare industry in the United States. In fact, it is one of the most respected occupations in America.
Making a career in nursing can actually give you a deep sense of satisfaction as you could be one of the few persons who can be the crucial link between patients and doctors. Depending upon the situations, many patients spend far more time interacting with a nurse than they do with a doctor. Any physicians can diagnose and just prescribe the medicines or methods to get cure from the disease, but it is a nurse who actually administers the curing procedure. Doctors may practice medicine, but it is a nurse who performs and guides in proper time to time taking of medicine.
It doesn’t matter, whether you are acting as a Licensed Practical Nurse or a Registered Nurse, you may be playing a very important role in making a real day to day difference in the lives of innumerable patients and their families. You will be on the front lines of the war on disease and injury, operating vital life saving technology, monitoring patients or even comforting family members. Beyond respect, there is also flexibility to choose where you wish to work, which hospital department you want to work or whether you want to work in a hospital as part time or full time.
Nowadays the field of nursing in the United States is frequently in requirement of well trained professionals, which eventually indicates that by selecting a nursing career you will constantly have an employment opportunity just around the corner. The present situation of health care industry clearly indicates that the probability to fill the large number of open nursing jobs now is very low and difficult. In fact, most of the cities in the United States are in need of more nurses and the ratio is expected to increase in next few years. As per the recent study, according to the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics, around one million new and replacement nurses will be needed by 2012, which definitely puts registered nursing as the leader in job growth. Adding to this, according to American Hospital Association, almost around 126,000 nurses are currently required to fill hospital job vacancies.
If you are looking for job security, then there is perhaps not a better career option than nursing. While LPNs can have no difficulty earning $35,000 to $40,000 a year, wages for registered nurses may reach even higher. Newly appointed registered nurses can enjoy earning between $45,000 and $60,000 right out of nursing school, depending on their location or willingness to relocate. Moreover, since most of the health care clinics and hospitals are short of nurses and as wages are primarily set by supply and demand, it clearly indicates that wages may continue to go up in next few years.
Certainly, nursing is an excellent career opportunity if you are looking to move into a different career. The rewards are abundant and in long-term career you may find and enjoy great satisfaction in helping other people who always need your support.
Making a career in nursing can actually give you a deep sense of satisfaction as you could be one of the few persons who can be the crucial link between patients and doctors. Depending upon the situations, many patients spend far more time interacting with a nurse than they do with a doctor. Any physicians can diagnose and just prescribe the medicines or methods to get cure from the disease, but it is a nurse who actually administers the curing procedure. Doctors may practice medicine, but it is a nurse who performs and guides in proper time to time taking of medicine.
It doesn’t matter, whether you are acting as a Licensed Practical Nurse or a Registered Nurse, you may be playing a very important role in making a real day to day difference in the lives of innumerable patients and their families. You will be on the front lines of the war on disease and injury, operating vital life saving technology, monitoring patients or even comforting family members. Beyond respect, there is also flexibility to choose where you wish to work, which hospital department you want to work or whether you want to work in a hospital as part time or full time.
Nowadays the field of nursing in the United States is frequently in requirement of well trained professionals, which eventually indicates that by selecting a nursing career you will constantly have an employment opportunity just around the corner. The present situation of health care industry clearly indicates that the probability to fill the large number of open nursing jobs now is very low and difficult. In fact, most of the cities in the United States are in need of more nurses and the ratio is expected to increase in next few years. As per the recent study, according to the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics, around one million new and replacement nurses will be needed by 2012, which definitely puts registered nursing as the leader in job growth. Adding to this, according to American Hospital Association, almost around 126,000 nurses are currently required to fill hospital job vacancies.
If you are looking for job security, then there is perhaps not a better career option than nursing. While LPNs can have no difficulty earning $35,000 to $40,000 a year, wages for registered nurses may reach even higher. Newly appointed registered nurses can enjoy earning between $45,000 and $60,000 right out of nursing school, depending on their location or willingness to relocate. Moreover, since most of the health care clinics and hospitals are short of nurses and as wages are primarily set by supply and demand, it clearly indicates that wages may continue to go up in next few years.
Certainly, nursing is an excellent career opportunity if you are looking to move into a different career. The rewards are abundant and in long-term career you may find and enjoy great satisfaction in helping other people who always need your support.
Question to ask on a first date
Conversation starters can literally save your life on a first date.
Why?
Well, as you know, going on a first date can be very scary and intimidating. Our minds are overcome with fear and insecurities and we cave in to those emotions.
We're scared of being rejected, we're afraid of failure, we're nervous about saying the wrong thing at the wrong time and we're anxious about what our date will think of us.
All these anxieties are totally human and completely understandable - but they produce devastating results: they paralyze us and greatly inhibit our ability to behave normally and confidently like we do with our family and with our closest friends.
Our personal fears lead us to the most uncomfortable situation where we feel a terrible lack of confidence, all stressed out, angry and frustrated. The bottom line is that we're doomed to end up in the most annoying, embarrassing and even humiliating situation, which we all know as that "awkward silence".
Believe it or not, most of us do have the capacity to carry on a fluid, easy-going and enjoyable conversation with people we have known for years - so, with the right approach, it shouldn't be any different with the woman we're on a first date with.
And the right approach is... conversation starters!
Preparing a list of topics and questions that you can use on the first date can do wonders for your dating skills.
When you have an arsenal of conversation starters - it's very easy to keep the conversation going.
You always have something to say, you develop a lively conversation like there's nothing to it, you're not nervous, "stuck" or "blocked" and you can avoid the awkward silence disaster pretty easily.
Here are 10 conversation starters that you can use on your next first date:
·Has any book had a major impact on you?
·What was the best bargain you ever found?
·What's the most annoying thing someone could do on a first date?
·What's the most unusual thing you know how to do?
·Is there anything you can't say "no" to?
·What food could they not pay you enough to eat?
·Who are your cult heroes? Why?
·What was the craziest thing you ever did when you were a kid?
·If you could have any job in the world, what would it be?
·What would be the title of your biography?
There are so many conversation starters that can work for you fantastically. They can serve as a great base for a flowing, lively, enjoyable conversation that can let your date learn about the "real you" while you leave all the pressure, anxiety and fear behind you.
Don't leave home to go out on a first date empty-handed. Sit down, prepare some great conversation starters, memorize and practice them and your chances for a great date will increase drastically
Why?
Well, as you know, going on a first date can be very scary and intimidating. Our minds are overcome with fear and insecurities and we cave in to those emotions.
We're scared of being rejected, we're afraid of failure, we're nervous about saying the wrong thing at the wrong time and we're anxious about what our date will think of us.
All these anxieties are totally human and completely understandable - but they produce devastating results: they paralyze us and greatly inhibit our ability to behave normally and confidently like we do with our family and with our closest friends.
Our personal fears lead us to the most uncomfortable situation where we feel a terrible lack of confidence, all stressed out, angry and frustrated. The bottom line is that we're doomed to end up in the most annoying, embarrassing and even humiliating situation, which we all know as that "awkward silence".
Believe it or not, most of us do have the capacity to carry on a fluid, easy-going and enjoyable conversation with people we have known for years - so, with the right approach, it shouldn't be any different with the woman we're on a first date with.
And the right approach is... conversation starters!
Preparing a list of topics and questions that you can use on the first date can do wonders for your dating skills.
When you have an arsenal of conversation starters - it's very easy to keep the conversation going.
You always have something to say, you develop a lively conversation like there's nothing to it, you're not nervous, "stuck" or "blocked" and you can avoid the awkward silence disaster pretty easily.
Here are 10 conversation starters that you can use on your next first date:
·Has any book had a major impact on you?
·What was the best bargain you ever found?
·What's the most annoying thing someone could do on a first date?
·What's the most unusual thing you know how to do?
·Is there anything you can't say "no" to?
·What food could they not pay you enough to eat?
·Who are your cult heroes? Why?
·What was the craziest thing you ever did when you were a kid?
·If you could have any job in the world, what would it be?
·What would be the title of your biography?
There are so many conversation starters that can work for you fantastically. They can serve as a great base for a flowing, lively, enjoyable conversation that can let your date learn about the "real you" while you leave all the pressure, anxiety and fear behind you.
Don't leave home to go out on a first date empty-handed. Sit down, prepare some great conversation starters, memorize and practice them and your chances for a great date will increase drastically
5 Funny Love peom
When most people think of love poems, they think of serious and soulful expressions of passion. Long sonnets by Shakespeare or romantic poems by Browning and Lord Byron are the norm for love poetry. However, funny love poems can be good for a laugh. They may not be romantic, but they do give your friends something to enjoy.
Some of the best funny love poems are limericks. Limericks started in Ireland and follow a standard form of five lines and a rhyme scheme of aabba. Here are a few limericks written by anonymous authors:
There once was an old man of Lyme
Who married three wives at a time
When asked "Why a third?"
He replied, "One's absurd!
And bigamy, Sir, is a crime."
There was a young fellow named Hammer
Whose had an unfortunate stammer
"The b-bane of my life"
Said he, "Is m-m-my wife
D-d-d-d-d-d-damn ‘er!"
She made friends with a young undertaker;
Her last boyfriend had forsaken her.
But she started to curse
When he turned up in a hearse.
She said next time I'll date a baker!
There was a young lady named Constance,
From boys she wouldn't stand any nonsense.
If her partners grew deft
She would lead with her left;
The results would not weigh on her conscience.
My sweetheart and I are just wed.
Already I wish I were dead.
Two weeks she's been spending.
It was time never ending.
We are thousands of pounds in the red!
Limericks are fairly easy to write if you can rhyme well, so you might try writing a limerick yourself that includes the name of your friend or loved one. This is a good way to make a funny love poem that is personalized.
You can find more information about funny poems at:
http://www.love-poems-quotes.info/funny-love-poems.html
Some of the best funny love poems are limericks. Limericks started in Ireland and follow a standard form of five lines and a rhyme scheme of aabba. Here are a few limericks written by anonymous authors:
There once was an old man of Lyme
Who married three wives at a time
When asked "Why a third?"
He replied, "One's absurd!
And bigamy, Sir, is a crime."
There was a young fellow named Hammer
Whose had an unfortunate stammer
"The b-bane of my life"
Said he, "Is m-m-my wife
D-d-d-d-d-d-damn ‘er!"
She made friends with a young undertaker;
Her last boyfriend had forsaken her.
But she started to curse
When he turned up in a hearse.
She said next time I'll date a baker!
There was a young lady named Constance,
From boys she wouldn't stand any nonsense.
If her partners grew deft
She would lead with her left;
The results would not weigh on her conscience.
My sweetheart and I are just wed.
Already I wish I were dead.
Two weeks she's been spending.
It was time never ending.
We are thousands of pounds in the red!
Limericks are fairly easy to write if you can rhyme well, so you might try writing a limerick yourself that includes the name of your friend or loved one. This is a good way to make a funny love poem that is personalized.
You can find more information about funny poems at:
http://www.love-poems-quotes.info/funny-love-poems.html
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